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The section of Offending Women made me really angry. I had been angered before at some of the problematic aspects of both the programs that the author was assessing but this chapter struck me as particularly problematic. Many of the practices that were to get women to “open up” seemed almost like some kind of psychological torture, forcing the inmates into hysteria without any real way to build them back up. I was disturbed by the way in which the social aspects of their traumas/stories were ignored to draw focus on the ways in which their “addictive” personalities led to them being imprisoned… It seemed almost violent to the minds and hearts of these women to force them to relive their stories and then place the blame entirely on them for their situation. I was also really angry when Haney was describing the search through the women’s belongings. There was a complete lack of boundaries and privacy, both of which I think people are entitled to. Especially when they went through the women’s things and threw out what the institution had decided were not “necessities.” One of the women had saved up shampoos and toiletries for when she leaves; probably knowing full well what its like not to have money and no access to those things. The staff member cleaning out her room laughed. She laughed, without even bothering to address why that inmate would’ve felt that she needed to stock up on toiletries in the first place.
One woman's freedom is another woman's imprisonment
The description of the Visions community in chapter 5 is reminding me in ways of the Delpit article because it displays the ways in which a liberal, middle class, white agenda about personal growth and well-being can actually be incredibly harmful due to the ways it clashes with the realities of systematic oppression. The ways that the staff people thought of themselves as “liberating” the women, by telling them they couldn’t wear makeup or sexually revealing clothing, when in fact, that is one perception of freedom oppressing these women’s ability to control the external expression of their identities.
This also makes me think about intentional communities in general -- and when and why they work and fail. This seems to produce evidence that, if an intentional community is established, and you bring in and subject others to the intentions of that community who are not devoted to the ideals, but rather are prisoners of those ideals, it becomes another form of incarceration, even if it’s more “humane” according to middle class standards.
“I looked at her and realized that she wasn’t the same woman who entered [Visions] a year ago. This time she couldn’t make it but maybe next time she will… My job is to make the women aware of their psychological pain. She’s aware of it now. So in some way, it was a kind of victory” (176).
Unveiling Prison Employees Too!
When I heard that the Warden was not coming to our class, I was extremely disappointed. Much like the invisibility of prisoners, I feel like the people who work within the system are also invisible. Although I wasn't expecting hirer to share a personal anecdote from her life beyond the prison walls, I did want to see a face and notice the impact it would have on me. When discussing "female offenders" in class, I sometimes forget that the people who must "deal" with them are prisoners as well--they are confined to watching the inmates, confined to possible, and justifiable, fear for their lives every day at work, and, like Tamika from Visions, confined to being an emotionless being. Although Haney gives voice and insight into the lives of the Vision workers, only on the job of course, I also see that even with visibility, Haney was able to capture reservation from the workers. For instance, Tamika did not believe in being emotional while Margaret distanced herself by taking advantage of the power she had over her employees. So it seems that the issue is two-fold: prison employees are invisible from society but at the same time choose invisibility. I wonder if I would have sensed this with the warden and what kind of questions would have come up as a result. Like we do with the inmates we read about, I would like to have a conversation about the ethnic/racial/class make-up of the employees.
4Oct2012Vision4: Desire-based research and Vision's addiction concept
A couple of classes ago, we discussed the complications with making research based in desire. While we thought that desire-based was more beneficial/was the extra layer that damage-based research needed, using the diction choice of "desire" disturbed us a little bit. In other words, what Eve Tuck was trying to advocate (a more holistic approach to research, and not concentrating on only what wrong has been imposed onto a group) may not be best encompassed by the word desire, since it associates persons as always "wanting" something or addicted to something.
Visions, then, seems to be the end product of what worried us so much. By solely using the rhetoric of "desire" and "addictions" to address what problems the women may have, it seems to limit and test them in ways that could turn out to be more damaging than fruitful. Admittedly, I haven't read through the book yet, so I can't make a stance on how Haney sees this plays out, but so far, Visions and its practice of trying to channel desires to other "healthy" avenues seems to be awful in its own way. To have the women always in a space of complete transparency, allowing them to speak whatever they might to a peer in the hotseat--it's pretty brutal. I may be making connections that might not make sense in those post, but I'm worried.
To always think about people in terms of desire is not good.
Required to speak
I light of our recent Silence (and Serendip) conversations about getting to know each other better, I was interested in the expectations that were put upon the Visions women to "share" during group therapy sessions. Haney notes that the aim of these therapy sessions was "to push one another to divulge and reflect [...] quite specific things". I was so troubled by the notion that these women were required by the rules of the facility to share specific parts of their life -- they even didn't get to choose the proper time or avenue. As I mentioned in my last Silence post, although I desperately want to know more about you all (and props to Chandrea's activity today!) stronger still is my desire for us as a class to feel comfortable or inspired to share. In my opinion, everyone should have the choice to pick silence, especially when it comes to revealing very personal experiences. Unfortunately, due to the structure of the program, women at Visions didn't have that choice. And, in regards to the core goal of the program, I feel like being forced into discovering your voice isn't nearly as "therapeutic" as being given a safe space to find it on your own.
split scene
Footing. One two three four cacophanous stepping + sideways glancing. Breezes brushing momentums hurricaning whirling bumping off shoulders crossing paths. "I'm sorry." looking streetward. House on the corner is watering. Sky is watering. The house is leaving. turreted walls leaking green living, dripping growing flowering consuming. Sky greying and clearing. footsteps echoing. smell of gasolene music bumping. screeching. loudening breaking thumping. ground shaking. bass tone voices blaring. returning home -- quieting centering
tree sitting in Taft. bee crawling. black and yellow refracting -- gossamer winging. sky darkening cold invading. pen failing raindrops washing blurring dissolving paper. Sounding off leaves. Smelling of fountaining Taft. engrossing. fluffy squirrel foraging ignoring. chipmunk creeping a foot away clawing scaling the tree scurrying changing directionals startling startled dissappearing. scurrying along decaying grounding -- deadening?
Visions as a Damage-Centered Program
When finishing part two of Offending Women, where they talk about Vision's idea of therapy and addiction as solutions and causes for the women's incarceration, I was particularly struck by how good intentions can go bad. It seems like the women involved in the program had good intentions, but had much difficulty executing them in productive ways for the incarcerated women. I was horrified at the lack of privacy the women in Visions were given, not only in respect to the program but with the expectation that they should air out their problems and lives for everybody to see. This was especially evident when incoming women were asked to write "autos" in which they fully detailed traumatic experiences and just bad situations. Not only were they asked to revisit them but they were also asked to "perform" them. That just didn't sit well with me. I was horrified. As someone who deals better with trauma and difficult experiences alone, focusing on self-reflection, I can't imagine being asked to completely break down in front of an audience when I'm not ready. I don't understand how helping these women "unmask" themselves or open up about their struggles serves as anything else than feeling shame, guilt, anger, pain. I wonder where the opportunity for positive experiences went. This program seemed very much "damage-centered."
The Miller Memorial Bench. Observation #3
The first few minutes of my third trip to my spot followed the basic general format that I had followed in my previous observation periods. I sat on the bench, taking into account how there were growing splotches of color in the tree leaves above the Nature Trail, noting the relative isolation of the spot being interrupted by early morning runners, noticing the mushrooms starting to grow around the bench, hearing the car horns as a traffic jam started to form on Haverford Avenue, and looking for other aspects of my location that were not the same as the previous week’s visit. But after a while of this, I kept thinking back to the alien world in Vaster Than Empires and More Slow and our class discussion about potential forms of plant sentience. By constantly thinking back to these subjects, I started considering whether my surroundings had a form of sentience and wondering if my presence at the bench was being registered by an alien mind? I began asking myself more and more questions regarding this concept such as:
- Did the leaves and pine needles lying on the ground share the same manner of sentience the trees they came from hold and lost that sentience when they fell from the trees or did they possess a separate form of sentience than the trees they come possess?
Processes - leaves and sweat, heros and songs
encounter #3: The Fear.// one huge mass of flying ants crawling over and upwards // Rambling – the urge to discover – to see what was cut away // What are we trying to create? Harnessing // giant trees in the jumble vs. giant tress on campus, surrounded only by grass
encounter #2: man-made yellow borders sprayed in/onto the ground. little flags, victory over the conquered land, staked claims to the squared off, colonized dead grass. insecticide. In the air: thousands of tiny white bugs. where are they when it’s not humid?
encounter #1: my body in the humidity – leg hairs, sweat behind my knees, gathering at the edge of my forehead, water leaving my body, why? for the sake of preserving, just like the leaves. the purpose of sweat and leaves. mud. barefoot. some of the grass slides in the mud with the pressure of my toes. I imagine that by walking – just walking – I am tearing the away roots’ fragile hold on the saturated ground.
#3 –
disturbed at the power
of trees – gargantuan – so
different in the jumble
gargantuan trees –
their power is in place, a force
contained by mowed grass
#1 –
I re-discover;
My body’s sense of leaving
as leafing. Purpose.
Injured Animal Seeks Shelter
This week, I share in Sarah's distance predicament. I always thought Rock was rather close to where I live, but apparently that distance is subjective. Last week, when I was perfectly able, the tree was not far at all. This week, with an injury, I might as well have walked to Brecon. By the time I got there, standing for too long became difficult and sitting on the tree was the worst of all. I had no hope of climbing it. I stood on the ground in the shade of the damp tree for as long as I could, but after a while I had to go back to my human den to lie down. What if I didn't have a comfortable, soft white bed to fall into? What if I, like any other species, had to live in the wild? I would choose this spot. It is shady and secluded from predators and outside influences and I would probably deal with the pain of my injury and climb the tree until I was hidden more and until I found a comfortable branch. I would have to put up with all the spiders and who knows what else that I have chosen to eliminate from my human-space room, but I would be used to them. It would be okay.
The pinecones continue to be an interesting thing to look at. I found they are especially interesting from the ground, where I have never really looked at them before. I am not yet sure if this matters in my decision to choose a new wilderness home to lie down in.